If your spouse is considering leaving a “safe” career to become his/her own boss, it can be very daunting to think about the changes and possible risks this will have on the life you have created together. While there will be days without wins, the benefits of supporting your spouse in this decision and throughout the process can far outweigh the uncertainty. A life in which your spouse can provide an income while feeling passionate and purposeful brings an incredibly positive energy to the home. A life in which your spouse is allowed to take chances and realize dreams brings cause for celebration when you least expect it but most need it.
As the wife of a "working-for-the-man" turned entrepreneurial husband, I have had a few realizations throughout this transition that I know have kept our marriage strong and have allowed both of us to experience the benefits of entrepreneurship.
1. Plan
Creating a plan together may seem obvious, but this important step should not be taken lightly. You and your spouse should be on the same page from the very beginning regarding expectations. Discuss what your life together will look like once your spouse leaves his/her current career. Can you live on one income while your spouse is in start-up mode and for how long? What will your new budget look like? How will your health insurance and retirement plans be affected? What will the new work hours look like and what demands will these hours place on your schedule? Discuss boundaries and how far you are willing to be stretched in supporting your spouse. These are just a few points of discussion that need to be worked through before your spouse makes the transition to entrepreneurship.
2. Listen
Communication is key. As husband and wife, you are in this new endeavor together. I don’t always completely comprehend my husband’s business intentions the first time they are discussed. These discussions may involve day to day decisions, or decisions that could potentially impact the next several years. When I don’t “get it”, I ask again, and I listen to learn, not just to reply with my own perspective. By truly listening, I not only get a chance to understand the action involved, but a chance to empathize with the why behind the action. Additionally, there will be many instances in which your spouse may need a sounding board or validation, and you will feel gratitude from your spouse in filling that role.
3. Serve
My husband and I have the same college degree and the first three years of our careers were very similar. However, the last ten years have brought different experiences and skill sets to our resumes. You career path may be vastly different from that of your spouse, and you may feel there is no way to get involved with this new endeavor. This is not at all the case. Use your strengths to serve your entrepreneur. Are you technologically savvy? Great! Offer to help set up the business software or link emails to necessary devices. Are you a great multi-tasker? Fantastic! You may need this skill set to manage your own career, get dinner on the table, and be the best bedtime-story reader ever while your spouse is burning the midnight oil working on the new business. Are you eternally optimistic? Be the first to celebrate your spouse's accomplishments or offer encouragement when it is most needed. Serving your spouse allows you the opportunity to be involved and feel more connected to the vision you are creating for your future together.
Whether you are with someone who is considering going out on his\her own, or you are considering it yourself, know that you can make the successful journey together if you know your limits, communicate, and stay involved.